Don’t neglect to reach out and let your circle know that they are welcome to help. This may be in the form of meals or simply helping out with light chores or children so you can focus on your new little one.
Care Calendars have become popular and I highly recommend them. If you aren’t familiar with the concept of a Care Calendar, it’s essentially a schedule passed around to friends and family which lines out who is bringing you a meal and when. Our church family has been gracious enough to do this for me for all four of my children! It’s a huge help in that first month when all you want to do is take care of your newborn.
Here are some other ways people can help
Bring the baby to mom for feedings
Watch for hunger cues
Burp the baby
Hold the baby skin to skin
Change diapers
Walk, rock, swing and cuddle the baby
Help with household duties
Bathe the baby
Take care of the other children
Offer encouragement
Be there!
Hand written notes can be a great way to communicate on topics that are difficult or hard to time. Don't hesitate to help your partner understand your needs by spelling it out in a friendly note!
Notes from dad to mom
Treat me like I know what I a doing, teach me when I don’t
Look at me like you used to
Let me help when you are tired
Arrange to spend some alone time with me
Do something special for me
Do care activities together until I feel comfortable
Take my advice
Be agreeable with my family
Encourage me to be part of the special relationship you have with the baby
Call me “Dad”
Ask me what my concerns are and listen
Ask for help if you need it
Notes from mom to dad
Take the baby every once in a while and give me a break
Tell me I am doing a good job
Be my “breastfeeding coach”
Plan something special for the two of us
Give me a massage
Send me flowers
Limit my visitors
Make dinner or breakfast in bed
Be agreeable with my family
Wash the pump kit
Do some of the housework
Plan time so I can sleep
Just listen and offer support
Be our advocate for nursing
Bring the baby to me for nighttime feedings
Give my pumped breastmilk at some feedings
Get involved in our baby’s care
Ask for help if you need it
Talk proudly to your friends about breastfeeding
It can be hard to reach out and ask for help. Some of us are practiced givers but poor receivers. Take this as an opportunity to allow people to help you. Everyone involved will benefit, I promise.